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in my house.in my head.


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you're all screaming in the background

as i hold in my heart feelings unwanted

you cant take me seriously because i reveal myself in sarcasm,

a way to hide my head

wishing to escape

the surroundings and the brain

i just want an once of freedom

a place peaceful

to rest my head

im sick of rules holding me back

humans were born to be held down

all forms of oppression are wrong

let me be

let me free

 

your words are sharp and painful

but nothing compares to that look

i know your crazy

but i still blame myself

its all my fault

if only i could control myself

i could fix this

why cant i do whats right?

why

me

 

my life is nothing

and im gonna wither to nothingness

i dont deserve the pleasure of food

i can only feel the pain anyway

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Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

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Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

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Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

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Share on other sites

Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

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Share on other sites

Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

Shoprite muffins? :blink: Not for me.

Now make that... Thomas' Sandwich Size English Muffins, and I cannot resist.

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Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

Shoprite muffins? :blink: Not for me.

Now make that... Thomas' Sandwich Size English Muffins, and I cannot resist.

omg shoprite muffins are so much better. i mean like the fresh ones. i caved to one yesterday. im actually bloated from all i ate yesterday =[ i feel terrible

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Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

Shoprite muffins? :blink: Not for me.

Now make that... Thomas' Sandwich Size English Muffins, and I cannot resist.

omg shoprite muffins are so much better. i mean like the fresh ones. i caved to one yesterday. im actually bloated from all i ate yesterday =[ i feel terrible

Which muffin is your favorite?

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Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

Shoprite muffins? :blink: Not for me.

Now make that... Thomas' Sandwich Size English Muffins, and I cannot resist.

omg shoprite muffins are so much better. i mean like the fresh ones. i caved to one yesterday. im actually bloated from all i ate yesterday =[ i feel terrible

Which muffin is your favorite?

either cranberry orange or blueberry crumb

yuuummmmmm

:[

ugh i SERIOUSLY thought by highschool i would be thin(somehow, idk i was dumb)

and now its almost over and i couldnt be more unhappy. its a goal i want SO bad. but ive never tried for anything :[

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Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

Shoprite muffins? :blink: Not for me.

Now make that... Thomas' Sandwich Size English Muffins, and I cannot resist.

omg shoprite muffins are so much better. i mean like the fresh ones. i caved to one yesterday. im actually bloated from all i ate yesterday =[ i feel terrible

Which muffin is your favorite?

either cranberry orange or blueberry crumb

yuuummmmmm

:[

ugh i SERIOUSLY thought by highschool i would be thin(somehow, idk i was dumb)

and now its almost over and i couldnt be more unhappy. its a goal i want SO bad. but ive never tried for anything :[

Blueberry crumb would be my favorite. :D

 

When you get out of your house and into college, I do believe you will find a different outlook on life and will lose the weight.

High school is just too stressful.

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Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

Shoprite muffins? :blink: Not for me.

Now make that... Thomas' Sandwich Size English Muffins, and I cannot resist.

omg shoprite muffins are so much better. i mean like the fresh ones. i caved to one yesterday. im actually bloated from all i ate yesterday =[ i feel terrible

Which muffin is your favorite?

either cranberry orange or blueberry crumb

yuuummmmmm

:[

ugh i SERIOUSLY thought by highschool i would be thin(somehow, idk i was dumb)

and now its almost over and i couldnt be more unhappy. its a goal i want SO bad. but ive never tried for anything :[

Blueberry crumb would be my favorite. :D

 

When you get out of your house and into college, I do believe you will find a different outlook on life and will lose the weight.

High school is just too stressful.

i think im gonna do something and ill be as thin as i want then

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Share on other sites

Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

Shoprite muffins? :blink: Not for me.

Now make that... Thomas' Sandwich Size English Muffins, and I cannot resist.

omg shoprite muffins are so much better. i mean like the fresh ones. i caved to one yesterday. im actually bloated from all i ate yesterday =[ i feel terrible

Which muffin is your favorite?

either cranberry orange or blueberry crumb

yuuummmmmm

:[

ugh i SERIOUSLY thought by highschool i would be thin(somehow, idk i was dumb)

and now its almost over and i couldnt be more unhappy. its a goal i want SO bad. but ive never tried for anything :[

Blueberry crumb would be my favorite. :D

 

When you get out of your house and into college, I do believe you will find a different outlook on life and will lose the weight.

High school is just too stressful.

i think im gonna do something and ill be as thin as i want then

:blink: What do you plan to do? :blink:

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Share on other sites

Your messages are always so powerful.

thats because self-hate has got to be one of the most powerful things ever

Unfortunately, you are probably right.

thats okay cuz im gonna fix me. physically at least

You know I am pleased to hear you say that.

:closedeyes: bad start. i cant help it. im terrible at self-discipline

Not that many are.

today will be better,as long as i dont yield to the power of shoprite muffins.. soo good *drools*

Shoprite muffins? :blink: Not for me.

Now make that... Thomas' Sandwich Size English Muffins, and I cannot resist.

omg shoprite muffins are so much better. i mean like the fresh ones. i caved to one yesterday. im actually bloated from all i ate yesterday =[ i feel terrible

Which muffin is your favorite?

either cranberry orange or blueberry crumb

yuuummmmmm

:[

ugh i SERIOUSLY thought by highschool i would be thin(somehow, idk i was dumb)

and now its almost over and i couldnt be more unhappy. its a goal i want SO bad. but ive never tried for anything :[

Blueberry crumb would be my favorite. :D

 

When you get out of your house and into college, I do believe you will find a different outlook on life and will lose the weight.

High school is just too stressful.

i think im gonna do something and ill be as thin as i want then

:blink: What do you plan to do? :blink:

i cant say it on here. you wouldnt allow it and i dont as much PLAN on doing it as much as i see it happening.

idk im SOOOOOO far from worrying about that right now.

today i actually cried in lunch.

i know that sounds mellowdrmatic teengirlproblem-y but seriously.. no matter how angry,depressed or hopeless i feel i can usually tuck it away for lunch.

no, i put my head down and i cried. cuz no matter how much i push this away, i am miserable. straight up.. miserable

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

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Share on other sites

lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

 

and its just cuz ive felt sick forever.

i think its cuz your well being in your head directly affects your immune system

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

 

and its just cuz ive felt sick forever.

i think its cuz your well being in your head directly affects your immune system

i learn all the best stuff in pysch. i wish i wasnt so tired that period.

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Share on other sites

lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

 

and its just cuz ive felt sick forever.

i think its cuz your well being in your head directly affects your immune system

i learn all the best stuff in pysch. i wish i wasnt so tired that period.

we read all about altered states of consciousness. its the only class i LIKE in school. maybe i should make my college search around it? the only 2 interests i have are animals and that. and i cant be a vet or anything cuz im terrible at bio lol

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

 

and its just cuz ive felt sick forever.

i think its cuz your well being in your head directly affects your immune system

i learn all the best stuff in pysch. i wish i wasnt so tired that period.

we read all about altered states of consciousness. its the only class i LIKE in school. maybe i should make my college search around it? the only 2 interests i have are animals and that. and i cant be a vet or anything cuz im terrible at bio lol

You ought to think about taking more psychology courses. They are very interesting. In addition to having interesting courses, you have a wide variety of careers where you can use a psychology degree.

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

 

and its just cuz ive felt sick forever.

i think its cuz your well being in your head directly affects your immune system

i learn all the best stuff in pysch. i wish i wasnt so tired that period.

we read all about altered states of consciousness. its the only class i LIKE in school. maybe i should make my college search around it? the only 2 interests i have are animals and that. and i cant be a vet or anything cuz im terrible at bio lol

You ought to think about taking more psychology courses. They are very interesting. In addition to having interesting courses, you have a wide variety of careers where you can use a psychology degree.

lol i cant. im stuck in high school. we only have one.

and im in it.

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lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

 

and its just cuz ive felt sick forever.

i think its cuz your well being in your head directly affects your immune system

i learn all the best stuff in pysch. i wish i wasnt so tired that period.

we read all about altered states of consciousness. its the only class i LIKE in school. maybe i should make my college search around it? the only 2 interests i have are animals and that. and i cant be a vet or anything cuz im terrible at bio lol

You ought to think about taking more psychology courses. They are very interesting. In addition to having interesting courses, you have a wide variety of careers where you can use a psychology degree.

lol i cant. im stuck in high school. we only have one.

and im in it.

Do you live near a college? If so, see if you would sign up for one of those classes. Lots of colleges have courses that anyone is permitted to sign up for. I think you would really enjoy this as it would get you into a new environment for a little bit.

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Share on other sites

lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

 

and its just cuz ive felt sick forever.

i think its cuz your well being in your head directly affects your immune system

i learn all the best stuff in pysch. i wish i wasnt so tired that period.

we read all about altered states of consciousness. its the only class i LIKE in school. maybe i should make my college search around it? the only 2 interests i have are animals and that. and i cant be a vet or anything cuz im terrible at bio lol

You ought to think about taking more psychology courses. They are very interesting. In addition to having interesting courses, you have a wide variety of careers where you can use a psychology degree.

lol i cant. im stuck in high school. we only have one.

and im in it.

Do you live near a college? If so, see if you would sign up for one of those classes. Lots of colleges have courses that anyone is permitted to sign up for. I think you would really enjoy this as it would get you into a new environment for a little bit.

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Share on other sites

lol im emo. i never say anything happy on here.

 

sometimes its just good to write a little. really scratch the pen to paper, get it out. and even little things can put things in perpective. im proud of what i did. and im starting to see the ways that life just cannot be fair. but when everything is okay, and im relaxed and with my friends, everything seems doable. it opens up my mind. im more optimitic and pain free. everything calms and cottonmouth is there.

haha

:]

have a cool day.

night?day? what time is it?

I'm going riding.

It's morning. :D

:]]

yay

It was a stupendous day! I rode over 400 miles. :)

thats fun.

i woke up and just COULD NOT wait to curl back up into bed at 3pm.

but i didnt end up doing that.

and im glad. cuz i feel sick and cant wait to sleep easy

Hope you are not getting the flu. That would be awful.

 

and its just cuz ive felt sick forever.

i think its cuz your well being in your head directly affects your immune system

i learn all the best stuff in pysch. i wish i wasnt so tired that period.

we read all about altered states of consciousness. its the only class i LIKE in school. maybe i should make my college search around it? the only 2 interests i have are animals and that. and i cant be a vet or anything cuz im terrible at bio lol

You ought to think about taking more psychology courses. They are very interesting. In addition to having interesting courses, you have a wide variety of careers where you can use a psychology degree.

lol i cant. im stuck in high school. we only have one.

and im in it.

Do you live near a college? If so, see if you would sign up for one of those classes. Lots of colleges have courses that anyone is permitted to sign up for. I think you would really enjoy this as it would get you into a new environment for a little bit.

kinda. but i have no car lol

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