xMyOwnMindx Posted October 23, 2007 Report Share Posted October 23, 2007 i dont see it.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted October 23, 2007 Report Share Posted October 23, 2007 i dont see it.. Nothing has been rejected. I thought you had replies to your last poem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted October 24, 2007 Author Report Share Posted October 24, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted October 24, 2007 Report Share Posted October 24, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted October 27, 2007 Author Report Share Posted October 27, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. eh it was boring anyway ha thats me boring Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Topazia Posted October 28, 2007 Report Share Posted October 28, 2007 thats meboring that's a laugh! you're not boring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mega Wolf Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. eh it was boring anyway ha thats me boring You? Boring? XD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted October 29, 2007 Author Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. eh it was boring anyway ha thats me boring You? Boring? XD to the extreme lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mega Wolf Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. eh it was boring anyway ha thats me boring You? Boring? XD to the extreme lol There's plenty of people even more boring than you. XD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. eh it was boring anyway ha thats me boring You? Boring? XD to the extreme lol There's plenty of people even more boring than you. XD That would be me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted October 31, 2007 Author Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. eh it was boring anyway ha thats me boring You? Boring? XD to the extreme lol There's plenty of people even more boring than you. XD That would be me. the world is pretty boring. idk ive decided i think im bipolar i want to cry but im so excited about tomorrow its gonna be so much fun but yet, i dont want to wake up honestly, why me? why was i born with this sickness? my depression runs me and noone gets it they dont see into my head my heart were all shallow i know i am its hard cuz 1/2 of me is this 'live by your own heart, do what makes you happy' hippie chick and the other 1/2 of me wants to become perfect and dress all nice and know people n stuff im not saying i cant be both but there are no ednos hippies it just doesnt make sense as much as i want to just be okay with my life im not i cant be i cant stop hating myself i cant stand my body it really hurts me i weap at the thought of it and those arent just words i never wanted to be this person my whole childhood i never was this person im torn in half i dont understand im so happy so excited and there are tears running down my acnefilled oily skinned face i make myself sick i dont know wut i want anymore i want to throw up i dont know how to eat without wanting to KILL myself for it im destroying myself via cookies sometimes im so good salads for lunch just fruit during break and then i figure one day wont kill me and i pig out and i dont even want to think about wut ive done im so ashamed and all my friends are like "oh i grew out of that" i cant grow out of it there NATURALLY skinny anyway and i am not. every fabby pound makes me angry,suicidal and ever so shameful i want to have fun on halloween but afterwords so help me god, i will starve. i promise you i promise ana i promise all the girls working for something good and most of all i promise myself inside im screaming 'noo, why are you destroying yourself?' why why why why cant i feel okay? why cant i let this go? why am i so worthless so insecure why am i without friends why am i second guessing everything why are these laws holding me back why is everything stressing me out why cant i sleep why cant i pass why cant i feel okay? not even good just decent like im not about to cry at all times im so close to a breakdown and id rather have it now then hold it in till im a clinically insane adult whats wrong with me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mega Wolf Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. eh it was boring anyway ha thats me boring You? Boring? XD to the extreme lol There's plenty of people even more boring than you. XD That would be me. I was thinking more along the lines of people who like things normal. XD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 it was 'external use only' or something maybe im blind? Nothing has been deleted or even edited. I will also look. eh it was boring anyway ha thats me boring You? Boring? XD to the extreme lol There's plenty of people even more boring than you. XD That would be me. I was thinking more along the lines of people who like things normal. XD Are you suggesting I like abnormal things? LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 1, 2007 Author Report Share Posted November 1, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted November 1, 2007 Report Share Posted November 1, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Happy Halloween! Ranting is good. Getting out of your house sounds like it will be good for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 2, 2007 Author Report Share Posted November 2, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Happy Halloween! Ranting is good. Getting out of your house sounds like it will be good for you. yea tomorrow my ocd friend is comig over and im giving her a pack and 3 dollars (=$10) to help me clean my room and sort out my life. lol im so glad i have fridays off. ugh so tired. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted November 2, 2007 Report Share Posted November 2, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Happy Halloween! Ranting is good. Getting out of your house sounds like it will be good for you. yea tomorrow my ocd friend is comig over and im giving her a pack and 3 dollars (=$10) to help me clean my room and sort out my life. lol im so glad i have fridays off. ugh so tired. Sorting out your life is always good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 3, 2007 Author Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Happy Halloween! Ranting is good. Getting out of your house sounds like it will be good for you. yea tomorrow my ocd friend is comig over and im giving her a pack and 3 dollars (=$10) to help me clean my room and sort out my life. lol im so glad i have fridays off. ugh so tired. Sorting out your life is always good. lol well my room is clean as heck but i dont feel good about it. eh wutever.. "the faultfinder will find faults in anything" thats me :[[ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Happy Halloween! Ranting is good. Getting out of your house sounds like it will be good for you. yea tomorrow my ocd friend is comig over and im giving her a pack and 3 dollars (=$10) to help me clean my room and sort out my life. lol im so glad i have fridays off. ugh so tired. Sorting out your life is always good. lol well my room is clean as heck but i dont feel good about it. eh wutever.. "the faultfinder will find faults in anything" thats me :[[ This sounds crazy, but what or why do you not feel good about a clean room? It intrigues me to have a better understanding of your feelings underlying this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 4, 2007 Author Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Happy Halloween! Ranting is good. Getting out of your house sounds like it will be good for you. yea tomorrow my ocd friend is comig over and im giving her a pack and 3 dollars (=$10) to help me clean my room and sort out my life. lol im so glad i have fridays off. ugh so tired. Sorting out your life is always good. lol well my room is clean as heck but i dont feel good about it. eh wutever.. "the faultfinder will find faults in anything" thats me :[[ This sounds crazy, but what or why do you not feel good about a clean room? It intrigues me to have a better understanding of your feelings underlying this. cuz its like.. for instance.. having papers everywhere that are all about differenet stuff id rather have them spread out n stuff cuz i know where they are then have them all neatly put in a pile of random stuff idk its like reverse ocd or like.. the pile is.. a folder,some papers,a flattened thing of throat drops,a mag,a notebook, a thing of pins,a little bag, and ipodbox guts the pile is nice and neat and aside on my desk but it feels so messy and throw together to me i like the chaos of my room it seems plain cept for the walls man i have the best walls we should have a HD comp. where people take a pic of there room and we vote on best cuz thats one thing i have a shot at. my room is amazing just part of me wants to minimize it.. idk. everything is too random to put 'alike' things together besides like books and clothes i mean like.. notecards i might need or a coupon or one random candle im just bad at making things look good i guess idk i just want to be happy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Happy Halloween! Ranting is good. Getting out of your house sounds like it will be good for you. yea tomorrow my ocd friend is comig over and im giving her a pack and 3 dollars (=$10) to help me clean my room and sort out my life. lol im so glad i have fridays off. ugh so tired. Sorting out your life is always good. lol well my room is clean as heck but i dont feel good about it. eh wutever.. "the faultfinder will find faults in anything" thats me :[[ This sounds crazy, but what or why do you not feel good about a clean room? It intrigues me to have a better understanding of your feelings underlying this. cuz its like.. for instance.. having papers everywhere that are all about differenet stuff id rather have them spread out n stuff cuz i know where they are then have them all neatly put in a pile of random stuff idk its like reverse ocd or like.. the pile is.. a folder,some papers,a flattened thing of throat drops,a mag,a notebook, a thing of pins,a little bag, and ipodbox guts the pile is nice and neat and aside on my desk but it feels so messy and throw together to me i like the chaos of my room it seems plain cept for the walls man i have the best walls we should have a HD comp. where people take a pic of there room and we vote on best cuz thats one thing i have a shot at. my room is amazing just part of me wants to minimize it.. idk. everything is too random to put 'alike' things together besides like books and clothes i mean like.. notecards i might need or a coupon or one random candle im just bad at making things look good i guess idk i just want to be happy LOL... I understand. Let me guarantee you this... the pile will return to little piles soon. When you decide you need to look for something, you will spread out the big pile back to little piles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 11, 2007 Author Report Share Posted November 11, 2007 whats wrong with me? I don't believe there is anything wrong with you. I think there are things wrong with society. Extreme pressure is put on young people adding undue stress to their life. Once you move on into college, I do guarantee that things get better. High school is tough and a long four years. I would suggest that when you get out of college you try the Peace Corps. If you want to feel great about yourself, here is one way to accomplish this. In addition to helping others, you see part of the world you would not have had the opportunity to and you walk away having completed the goals set and meeting and developing new and fabulous friendships. I think you would really like this. Plus, it looks really phenomenal on a resume. the three reasons im SO EXCITED to go to college: 1. i will be in control of the food around me. if i go shopping and all i buy is salads and shove them in my mini fridge, with the ocasional dining hall and pizza delivery, ill be set 2.to get out of this town and this house its really stuck up around here and im over it and as for my house.. i just need out, ya kno? its a highly stressful unhappy environment and im just not built for it 3.i can smoke. freely. without worrying about breaking my mom's heart i cant wait. but at the same time, i so can.. idk its just hard to deal, i wanna pack up and start over meet new people, real, mature PEOPLE but just highschool preps and witchy wannabes i want to weed out my things i dont want this much i want to be simplistic i just want some order idk im done ranting happy halloween! Happy Halloween! Ranting is good. Getting out of your house sounds like it will be good for you. yea tomorrow my ocd friend is comig over and im giving her a pack and 3 dollars (=$10) to help me clean my room and sort out my life. lol im so glad i have fridays off. ugh so tired. Sorting out your life is always good. lol well my room is clean as heck but i dont feel good about it. eh wutever.. "the faultfinder will find faults in anything" thats me :[[ This sounds crazy, but what or why do you not feel good about a clean room? It intrigues me to have a better understanding of your feelings underlying this. cuz its like.. for instance.. having papers everywhere that are all about differenet stuff id rather have them spread out n stuff cuz i know where they are then have them all neatly put in a pile of random stuff idk its like reverse ocd or like.. the pile is.. a folder,some papers,a flattened thing of throat drops,a mag,a notebook, a thing of pins,a little bag, and ipodbox guts the pile is nice and neat and aside on my desk but it feels so messy and throw together to me i like the chaos of my room it seems plain cept for the walls man i have the best walls we should have a HD comp. where people take a pic of there room and we vote on best cuz thats one thing i have a shot at. my room is amazing just part of me wants to minimize it.. idk. everything is too random to put 'alike' things together besides like books and clothes i mean like.. notecards i might need or a coupon or one random candle im just bad at making things look good i guess idk i just want to be happy LOL... I understand. Let me guarantee you this... the pile will return to little piles soon. When you decide you need to look for something, you will spread out the big pile back to little piles. and then the chaos came back and now its making me upset again and yet no matter which way it is im unhappy with it. i know im a downer and i should just deal with it one way or another but i dont know how i cant(or dont feel like i can) control if something bugs me i cant just put it out of my head or just 'deal' cuz if i dont like something then i dont like it i cant help it i cant help but being unhappy about things things just bug me idk what to do cuz in terms of a pile of papers who really gives a &(&^%%&)(*)(? but when it comes to my life i need to fix this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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