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somehow today i feel alive

i guess because i can cause my own change

and fix things how i like a bit

sure its not perfect

but nothing is

the small words of the chorus sing out to save me

im changed

and thats okay

theres something about change that angers me

maybe its a contol thing

i dont care

i feel okay

with a ting of guilt

consuming calories does that to me

but ive thought my way through this one

id rather be sick like that then any other way

all you see is sad

thats all i can write

there are no happy words

in my true form

of putting these words together

and you say they touch your heart

well i can hope

and i can see

that somethings are better left unsaid

and some days are worth dreading more then others

theres a freedom in money

i see why greed runs the world

its terrible but sometimes its so good

in a world where ive had no power

i can control a small portion of my living

all im missing is a great love

or just a good boy with a heart to match mine

i see that struggle, i do

but everyone needs to feel things for themselves

so dont tell me im lucky

cuz im not

to live a life so lonely

sometimes inside i just fall

my stomach aches

im all alone

but im okay at the moment

 

but wuts next?

i dont wanna read

i dont wanna write

i dont want to sleep

just to wake up and get ready for work

the candles lit

the lights are up

im running out of cigarettes to numb my empty stomach

and i see now how much i yern for this disease

i dont care if it hurts

i wont be completely there

i have no power

i will mearly try

its worked before

and i was happy to be that way

it was a purpose

a thought

an obsession

what else do i have but me?

whos gonna be there for everything?

whos gonna be there forever

just me

only me

little tiny me.

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