xMyOwnMindx Posted November 5, 2006 Report Share Posted November 5, 2006 okay, i need to speak with no one in partiular. its 5:16pm i cannot get a word through to my parents im trying to tell them that if you get to the point where words can be brushed off then you have power. bruises heal i can take a few hits but a few words pain me and my mom is the same way but they wont listen to a word i have to say im so sick of school its so beat i dont wanna clean my room its pointless im being a perfect mix of lazy angsy teen and smoker who's tried of all this. im so tired of aruging with them they cant do anything they think if they take my phone ill stop cursing? heck no! if they take my phone ill just be out alot more cuz i wont be able to get anywhere cuz i cant get a ride i guess im gonna have to compact growing up reall fast im getting my job minimum wage 7ish dollars an hour ill work my butt off pay for my phone my drugs my clothes and use home as a place to stay and freeload food its come to this im not "part" of my famiyl anymore im simplely a bother and honeslty im okay with it i just need some money and learn how to manage it and i can pick myself together cuz although i feel like im dealing with alot, im not i have no tragedies and no problems Susanna: Then what's wrong with me, huh? What is going on inside my head? Tell me, *Dr. Val*. What's your diag-nonsense? Valerie: You are a lazy, self-indulgent *little girl*, who is driving herself crazy. basically, thats me and i feel crazy cuz im all burnt out from smoking everyday and i cant do anything and all i know is i cant wait till they go out and im alone and i can sit and think and read, write and smoke a bowl with my friends i wanna clam everything down and feel okay i dont wanna feel controlled by food i know i loose weight like that (im about 7 pounds UP from the lowest i got to) but it controls me and i AM NOT anorexic. i know its okay to be hungry to a deegree but i dont wanna feel like theres nothing else i need to see my best friend she spends EVERY second of the time shes not sleeping or at school with her boyfriend he picks her up from school at 2:30 and drops her off home at 11. then they talk on the phone till they fall asleep and call each other in the morning its like she traded drugs for an overbearing but equal relationship im made grimes right now i need to shower i need to breathe i cant take all this. but at least this week is crazy good. i have school tomorrow and wednesday. so basically.. im barely gonna sleep im messing up so bad me and mona both our friendships are changing we know were slipping but we cant stop we love being high love being smashed love trying new drugs and blowing off the world to feel good for a few hours to feel okay. (i dont want "i told you so" replys... i dont know if i wanna hear wut anyones gonna say. truth is scary.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted November 8, 2006 Report Share Posted November 8, 2006 *is silent* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted November 9, 2006 its okay. no words nessisary. k, so i FINALLY took a shower. im such a junkie. lol. im going out later as much as a mess up i seem all these drugs problems with my mom all that ive done 9 and 1/2 hours of serivce hours this week. very CRAZY i love the spice girls im entirely burnt out i can barely stand it when im sober i wish i wasnt and when im not im happy i cant go more then 3 days without something im hoping i can get some bud today mona's got robo and beer she was drunk and high on various drugs last night i watched the wall high like actually watched it cuz once before i tried watching it high but there were too many people there so everyone was talking and we didnt really watch but WOW. NEW FAVORITE MOVIE! im in love with the wall.. mmmmm pink floyd<333 so anyway im also in love with the shower i FINALLY got to take. i know, its nasty that i went so long w/o one but like monday night i partied, then crashed at mona's then went straight to hanging out with jamie,then i didnt shower for school cuz i thought id be okay.. yeah, gross.. then i went to liz's house and i wanted to shower between school and her house but i didnt have time and i was burnt as heck and i was like.. well if im gonna be smoking and all that then i can be gross, who cares so then i got picked up from them and i had CS to do so as soon as that was over i shower. thats NASTY 4 days... ew. anyway, in love with this kid named kev cuz his bud is the sexxxxxx darn, i love it i wanna party tomorrow is friday! gotta hit one up with mona. mmmm party scene<3333 im so there. i love it. and i know i gotta spend a day cleaning and doing my homework. i guess ill skip sleeping one night and do that i cant do homework this burnt but its neverending oh crud... my brain cells! hahahah PLU<333 stay sweet HD. ha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toto Posted November 10, 2006 Report Share Posted November 10, 2006 Drugs aren't cool ... drinking isn't cool ... smoking isn't cool ... partying isn't cool. I'm sorry, but you're falling into the stereotypical life of teenagers. There is nothing wrong with not doing those things, but I can see that you're trapped into the hands of things you can't control, the things you can't give up. It's sad. I hurt for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 10, 2006 Author Report Share Posted November 10, 2006 Drugs aren't cool ... drinking isn't cool ... smoking isn't cool ... partying isn't cool. I'm sorry, but you're falling into the stereotypical life of teenagers. There is nothing wrong with not doing those things, but I can see that you're trapped into the hands of things you can't control, the things you can't give up. It's sad. I hurt for you. oh relax man. thats not even about drugs that much! its got alot of CS in it. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchwork Posted November 13, 2006 Report Share Posted November 13, 2006 Drugs aren't cool ... drinking isn't cool ... smoking isn't cool ... partying isn't cool. I'm sorry, but you're falling into the stereotypical life of teenagers. There is nothing wrong with not doing those things, but I can see that you're trapped into the hands of things you can't control, the things you can't give up. It's sad. I hurt for you. oh relax man. thats not even about drugs that much! its got alot of CS in it. lol 1)what's CS? 2)no, but we know you do drugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 14, 2006 Author Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 Drugs aren't cool ... drinking isn't cool ... smoking isn't cool ... partying isn't cool. I'm sorry, but you're falling into the stereotypical life of teenagers. There is nothing wrong with not doing those things, but I can see that you're trapped into the hands of things you can't control, the things you can't give up. It's sad. I hurt for you. oh relax man. thats not even about drugs that much! its got alot of CS in it. lol 1)what's CS? 2)no, but we know you do drugs. 1. community serive 2. ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toto Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 Drugs aren't cool ... drinking isn't cool ... smoking isn't cool ... partying isn't cool. I'm sorry, but you're falling into the stereotypical life of teenagers. There is nothing wrong with not doing those things, but I can see that you're trapped into the hands of things you can't control, the things you can't give up. It's sad. I hurt for you. oh relax man. thats not even about drugs that much! its got alot of CS in it. lol 1)what's CS? 2)no, but we know you do drugs. 1. community serive 2. ... On a brighter note, where are you working now? I'm thinking about getting a job ... but I really don't know if I should. I'm turning fifteen in (exactly) a month, and would rather just wait to get a job at the movie theater, rather than work at a grocery store that's going down the drain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted November 14, 2006 Author Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 Drugs aren't cool ... drinking isn't cool ... smoking isn't cool ... partying isn't cool. I'm sorry, but you're falling into the stereotypical life of teenagers. There is nothing wrong with not doing those things, but I can see that you're trapped into the hands of things you can't control, the things you can't give up. It's sad. I hurt for you. oh relax man. thats not even about drugs that much! its got alot of CS in it. lol 1)what's CS? 2)no, but we know you do drugs. 1. community serive 2. ... On a brighter note, where are you working now? I'm thinking about getting a job ... but I really don't know if I should. I'm turning fifteen in (exactly) a month, and would rather just wait to get a job at the movie theater, rather than work at a grocery store that's going down the drain. i still dont have a job. i need one. lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 17, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 17, 2006 can i reply to this when the topic went away i wanna see wut happens Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted December 17, 2006 Report Share Posted December 17, 2006 It returns! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 18, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 18, 2006 It returns! thats pretty rad. it just pops back up! :] anyway, since this is my own personal thread about .. speaking.. wut i do best(worst? lol) i think ill continue.. i think im too young for the new message board i joined. im still so naive and inexpierienced compared to these people of all ages that post there.. alot of the people there are between 20 and like 40. its a pretty cool place though. very open. topics about sex, drugs, activism, politics, poetry, drinking, paranoia, hippies, the future etc. its pretty cool, but i am very ignorant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted December 18, 2006 Report Share Posted December 18, 2006 It returns! thats pretty rad. it just pops back up! :] anyway, since this is my own personal thread about .. speaking.. wut i do best(worst? lol) i think ill continue.. i think im too young for the new message board i joined. im still so naive and inexpierienced compared to these people of all ages that post there.. alot of the people there are between 20 and like 40. its a pretty cool place though. very open. topics about sex, drugs, activism, politics, poetry, drinking, paranoia, hippies, the future etc. its pretty cool, but i am very ignorant. I disagree. You definitely are not ignorant. Don't believe everything you read. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 18, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 18, 2006 It returns! thats pretty rad. it just pops back up! :] anyway, since this is my own personal thread about .. speaking.. wut i do best(worst? lol) i think ill continue.. i think im too young for the new message board i joined. im still so naive and inexpierienced compared to these people of all ages that post there.. alot of the people there are between 20 and like 40. its a pretty cool place though. very open. topics about sex, drugs, activism, politics, poetry, drinking, paranoia, hippies, the future etc. its pretty cool, but i am very ignorant. I disagree. You definitely are not ignorant. Don't believe everything you read. LOL i kno ignorant has a negative connotation, i dont mean it in a bad way.. i just mean that i have done alot ot learn from. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted December 19, 2006 Report Share Posted December 19, 2006 It returns! thats pretty rad. it just pops back up! :] anyway, since this is my own personal thread about .. speaking.. wut i do best(worst? lol) i think ill continue.. i think im too young for the new message board i joined. im still so naive and inexpierienced compared to these people of all ages that post there.. alot of the people there are between 20 and like 40. its a pretty cool place though. very open. topics about sex, drugs, activism, politics, poetry, drinking, paranoia, hippies, the future etc. its pretty cool, but i am very ignorant. I disagree. You definitely are not ignorant. Don't believe everything you read. LOL i kno ignorant has a negative connotation, i dont mean it in a bad way.. i just mean that i have done alot ot learn from. We all have something to learn. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 19, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 19, 2006 It returns! thats pretty rad. it just pops back up! :] anyway, since this is my own personal thread about .. speaking.. wut i do best(worst? lol) i think ill continue.. i think im too young for the new message board i joined. im still so naive and inexpierienced compared to these people of all ages that post there.. alot of the people there are between 20 and like 40. its a pretty cool place though. very open. topics about sex, drugs, activism, politics, poetry, drinking, paranoia, hippies, the future etc. its pretty cool, but i am very ignorant. I disagree. You definitely are not ignorant. Don't believe everything you read. LOL i kno ignorant has a negative connotation, i dont mean it in a bad way.. i just mean that i have done alot ot learn from. We all have something to learn. LOL this tru. i was so sad this place was down yesterday. im glad i had other forums though :]] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted December 19, 2006 Report Share Posted December 19, 2006 It returns! thats pretty rad. it just pops back up! :] anyway, since this is my own personal thread about .. speaking.. wut i do best(worst? lol) i think ill continue.. i think im too young for the new message board i joined. im still so naive and inexpierienced compared to these people of all ages that post there.. alot of the people there are between 20 and like 40. its a pretty cool place though. very open. topics about sex, drugs, activism, politics, poetry, drinking, paranoia, hippies, the future etc. its pretty cool, but i am very ignorant. I disagree. You definitely are not ignorant. Don't believe everything you read. LOL i kno ignorant has a negative connotation, i dont mean it in a bad way.. i just mean that i have done alot ot learn from. We all have something to learn. LOL this tru. i was so sad this place was down yesterday. im glad i had other forums though :]] I am really happy not to see any more fatal errors. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 19, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 19, 2006 It returns! thats pretty rad. it just pops back up! :] anyway, since this is my own personal thread about .. speaking.. wut i do best(worst? lol) i think ill continue.. i think im too young for the new message board i joined. im still so naive and inexpierienced compared to these people of all ages that post there.. alot of the people there are between 20 and like 40. its a pretty cool place though. very open. topics about sex, drugs, activism, politics, poetry, drinking, paranoia, hippies, the future etc. its pretty cool, but i am very ignorant. I disagree. You definitely are not ignorant. Don't believe everything you read. LOL i kno ignorant has a negative connotation, i dont mean it in a bad way.. i just mean that i have done alot ot learn from. We all have something to learn. LOL this tru. i was so sad this place was down yesterday. im glad i had other forums though :]] I am really happy not to see any more fatal errors. :] if your happy im happy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted December 19, 2006 Report Share Posted December 19, 2006 It returns! thats pretty rad. it just pops back up! :] anyway, since this is my own personal thread about .. speaking.. wut i do best(worst? lol) i think ill continue.. i think im too young for the new message board i joined. im still so naive and inexpierienced compared to these people of all ages that post there.. alot of the people there are between 20 and like 40. its a pretty cool place though. very open. topics about sex, drugs, activism, politics, poetry, drinking, paranoia, hippies, the future etc. its pretty cool, but i am very ignorant. I disagree. You definitely are not ignorant. Don't believe everything you read. LOL i kno ignorant has a negative connotation, i dont mean it in a bad way.. i just mean that i have done alot ot learn from. We all have something to learn. LOL this tru. i was so sad this place was down yesterday. im glad i had other forums though :]] I am really happy not to see any more fatal errors. :] if your happy im happy. LOL, well good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 20, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 20, 2006 luvin is what i got, i said rmember that. :] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 26, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 26, 2006 i get way too much for xmas Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted December 26, 2006 Report Share Posted December 26, 2006 i get way too much for xmas If you want, you could always give some of it away. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 27, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 27, 2006 pshhh O-kay. now i have to work on "wut i want for my b-day" i feel icky. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted December 27, 2006 Report Share Posted December 27, 2006 pshhh O-kay. now i have to work on "wut i want for my b-day" i feel icky. Start working! LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 27, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 27, 2006 pshhh O-kay. now i have to work on "wut i want for my b-day" i feel icky. Start working! LOL whyy? my b-day is in 35 daysss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted December 27, 2006 Report Share Posted December 27, 2006 pshhh O-kay. now i have to work on "wut i want for my b-day" i feel icky. Start working! LOL whyy? my b-day is in 35 daysss. I could say... "you snooze, you lose" or "she who hesitates is lost" or "do not put off to tomorrow, what you can do today" or... LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted December 28, 2006 Author Report Share Posted December 28, 2006 pshhh O-kay. now i have to work on "wut i want for my b-day" i feel icky. Start working! LOL whyy? my b-day is in 35 daysss. I could say... "you snooze, you lose" or "she who hesitates is lost" or "do not put off to tomorrow, what you can do today" or... LOL or 'sleep in, be happy' or 'you only live once' or 'the government has you' i just made $55. easy. babysitting with my friend. smoking before and during. life is sweet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted January 7, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 7, 2007 i am so frustrated. how can I make a difference? i cant do anything. i have a lousy attitude and i cant "start with home" cuz home is a battle in itself how can i achieve world peace in such a warzone? sometimes i wanna die to relieve the world of my hatred. i cant understand other's morals PEACE is more important then GOD. and dont say god=peace cuz i= peace w/o any religion in my life religion causes more wars and less peace theres nothing to do even the smallest issues are not being solved theres dying people and we're spending money on wars and killing and bombs and drug wars that are useless and full of hate when all us kids dropping acid believe in a better world why cant anyone see how i feel? i wanna break out of wut i know. my life is so little, so small someone tell me how i can make this change a difference wut could i possibly grow up to be that will benefit this WORLD, not just my own household and the money ill make for my children. i dont care. this all needs to change its so messed up i cant even deal with it all i cant even deal with my own life i need to go, before i cry. XOXOXOX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted January 10, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2007 this place is such a bore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horatio Posted January 10, 2007 Report Share Posted January 10, 2007 this place is such a bore. I'm sorry to hear that. You might try the government topic. Taynio posted there and I believe you will find it an interesting thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xMyOwnMindx Posted January 10, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2007 im too lazy to drag myself all the way there. why cant people just answer this? lol yeah, im quite lazy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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