Shrinking, right in front of you.

[xMyOwnMindx]

What im doing, isnt funny

the funny part is that im doing it right in front of you

and your too blind to see

when you tell me its bad

i lie "i guess"

so you dont understand

and i strave on

i see all the warning signs

every caution and every "no"

but i also see obsesity

in that mirror, that only wants to show me

i can be better

and i will be

sheading who i was

fat, worthless and a nobody

i will be the most envied

i will buy the smallest clothes

and sweetly say "no thank you"

when they give me sweets

i cant be protected anymore

i dont want to be the biggest

im so sick of this

this life

this body im stuck in

i cant be prettier

but the fact that i got this huge is MY fault

and im taking full repsonsiblity to change it

i want to be flawless

floating

through hunger and envy

everyday im doing better

and better and better

untill i am perfect underweight

tiny and hungry

i will be so pretty

and thinking about it excites me

i am loosing

i will be small

i have everyone supporting me

even the people that have no idea

what exactly theyre doing

like i used to be

less this, less that, plain nothing

i was clueless

but i can use it as power now

control wut i do

control the way i look

i will be little

i will show everyone

that ive been hiding in a fat suit

my entire life.

[Patchwork]

What im doing, isnt funny

the funny part is that im doing it right in front of you

and your too blind to see

when you tell me its bad

i lie "i guess"

so you dont understand

and i strave on

i see all the warning signs

every caution and every "no"

but i also see obsesity

in that mirror, that only wants to show me

i can be better

and i will be

sheading who i was

fat, worthless and a nobody

i will be the most envied

i will buy the smallest clothes

and sweetly say "no thank you"

when they give me sweets

i cant be protected anymore

i dont want to be the biggest

im so sick of this

this life

this body im stuck in

i cant be prettier

but the fact that i got this huge is MY fault

and im taking full repsonsiblity to change it

i want to be flawless

floating

through hunger and envy

everyday im doing better

and better and better

untill i am perfect underweight

tiny and hungry

i will be so pretty

and thinking about it excites me

i am loosing

i will be small

i have everyone supporting me

even the people that have no idea

what exactly theyre doing

like i used to be

less this, less that, plain nothing

i was clueless

but i can use it as power now

control wut i do

control the way i look

i will be little

i will show everyone

that ive been hiding in a fat suit

my entire life.

Topazia says to say she'd commend your writing, but the topic scares her a little. She's at school rite now, so she can't be on. But I'm here, and you know I'm a split off her personality. Well, anway, that's what she wanted me to say.

She's worried about you without even knowing why.

Actually, she does know why.

She's afraid for you.

Sarah, her ana friend, is also scared for you.

Sarah's been there, and she says it's all about control and self-loathing.

Sarah said to stop now, and stop telling yourself you're fat when you're not.

Honestly, I agree with Topazia and Sarah.

[xMyOwnMindx]

What im doing, isnt funny

the funny part is that im doing it right in front of you

and your too blind to see

when you tell me its bad

i lie "i guess"

so you dont understand

and i strave on

i see all the warning signs

every caution and every "no"

but i also see obsesity

in that mirror, that only wants to show me

i can be better

and i will be

sheading who i was

fat, worthless and a nobody

i will be the most envied

i will buy the smallest clothes

and sweetly say "no thank you"

when they give me sweets

i cant be protected anymore

i dont want to be the biggest

im so sick of this

this life

this body im stuck in

i cant be prettier

but the fact that i got this huge is MY fault

and im taking full repsonsiblity to change it

i want to be flawless

floating

through hunger and envy

everyday im doing better

and better and better

untill i am perfect underweight

tiny and hungry

i will be so pretty

and thinking about it excites me

i am loosing

i will be small

i have everyone supporting me

even the people that have no idea

what exactly theyre doing

like i used to be

less this, less that, plain nothing

i was clueless

but i can use it as power now

control wut i do

control the way i look

i will be little

i will show everyone

that ive been hiding in a fat suit

my entire life.

Topazia says to say she'd commend your writing, but the topic scares her a little. She's at school rite now, so she can't be on. But I'm here, and you know I'm a split off her personality. Well, anway, that's what she wanted me to say.

She's worried about you without even knowing why.

Actually, she does know why.

She's afraid for you.

Sarah, her ana friend, is also scared for you.

Sarah's been there, and she says it's all about control and self-loathing.

Sarah said to stop now, and stop telling yourself you're fat when you're not.

Honestly, I agree with Topazia and Sarah.

 

ha scared of what?

im not even that messed up

and im loosing weight

everyone loves it

im gonna be pretty

im gonan make luc proud

im gonna be smaller then my underweight boyfriend

so he can pick me up

and ill be "his beautiful girlfriend" not "that fat chick he kisses"

im doing this for everyone

myself, my friends,family, rob, everyone that has to SEE me

 

its not so bad

this poem was to rob

by the way

and some other people i guess

im not even hungry

yesterday i ate a TON

dont worry about it

im okay :]

[Hamster Luver]

i like the poem but patchwork are u topazias real life friend?

[Topazia]

i like the poem but patchwork are u topazias real life friend?

no

[xMyOwnMindx]

What im doing, isnt funny

the funny part is that im doing it right in front of you

and your too blind to see

when you tell me its bad

i lie "i guess"

so you dont understand

and i strave on

i see all the warning signs

every caution and every "no"

but i also see obsesity

in that mirror, that only wants to show me

i can be better

and i will be

sheading who i was

fat, worthless and a nobody

i will be the most envied

i will buy the smallest clothes

and sweetly say "no thank you"

when they give me sweets

i cant be protected anymore

i dont want to be the biggest

im so sick of this

this life

this body im stuck in

i cant be prettier

but the fact that i got this huge is MY fault

and im taking full repsonsiblity to change it

i want to be flawless

floating

through hunger and envy

everyday im doing better

and better and better

untill i am perfect underweight

tiny and hungry

i will be so pretty

and thinking about it excites me

i am loosing

i will be small

i have everyone supporting me

even the people that have no idea

what exactly theyre doing

like i used to be

less this, less that, plain nothing

i was clueless

but i can use it as power now

control wut i do

control the way i look

i will be little

i will show everyone

that ive been hiding in a fat suit

my entire life.

Topazia says to say she'd commend your writing, but the topic scares her a little. She's at school rite now, so she can't be on. But I'm here, and you know I'm a split off her personality. Well, anway, that's what she wanted me to say.

She's worried about you without even knowing why.

Actually, she does know why.

She's afraid for you.

Sarah, her ana friend, is also scared for you.

Sarah's been there, and she says it's all about control and self-loathing.

Sarah said to stop now, and stop telling yourself you're fat when you're not.

Honestly, I agree with Topazia and Sarah.

 

ha scared of what?

im not even that messed up

and im loosing weight

everyone loves it

im gonna be pretty

im gonan make luc proud

im gonna be smaller then my underweight boyfriend

so he can pick me up

and ill be "his beautiful girlfriend" not "that fat chick he kisses"

im doing this for everyone

myself, my friends,family, rob, everyone that has to SEE me

 

its not so bad

this poem was to rob

by the way

and some other people i guess

im not even hungry

yesterday i ate a TON

dont worry about it

im okay :]

 

paz^.

[Hamster Luver]

o, cuz i hate it when im with an online group of ppl and they are all real life friends and i am just friends with then from online, i feel so left out... haha