Mushroom_king

After dancing to a couple of songs, Cheesemaster had to sit and take a breather. "Cheesie, do you know where Dawn is? She was looking for you." "Oh, I...well, Jakob said-said he's hurt me if he saw me around her again." "Oh, I'm sure he didn't mean-" "Cheese Woman, don't you GET it?!" She looked at him, surprised. "Jakob HATES me!" "But...why?!" "How should I know..." "This doesn't have to do with...?" He sighed and looked at the ceiling. "With my past? But only you and Arkcher-only you two know about that." "Do you think he's jumping to conclusions based on your occupation?" "Possibly...hey, I made assumptions based on his. But I was correct on that one." "Whatever do you mean?" "I found he was a prosecutor and thought, he's probably a big jerk. And he was!" "Oh, Cheesie. Hush." "You know it's true! Remember when he nearly murdered me?! Yea, it's happened about 10 times!" "Cheesie-kun..." He sighed again. "I'm sorry for lashing out at you. You don't deserve it. Come on. Let's dance some more." "Alright!!" she said, giggling. Suddenly, someone tapped on Cheesemaster's shoulder. He turned around and gasped of shock to see it was Dawn. "Dawn!! What...are you doing?!" "Me and Sterling wanted to see you!" "But, Dawn..." "What is it?" "Jakob said he'd kill me if he saw me around you ever again." "Oh, he probably didn't mean it." "Dawn, he's tried to kill me before." "Are you trying to tell me you don't like me?!" "No, No! Nothing of that sort! Look, I'll hang out with you if it makes you feel better." "Yay! And Sterling, too!" ------------------------- But Cheesemaster was indeed correct about Jakob's threat. For Jakob was strolling about, looking for Dawn, and saw her with Cheesemaster and became furious; for in the past month or so, he had not been over at The Rabbitt Manor and he had presumed that he had heeded the warning. Apparently not. He knew how to deal with this...but he was afraid of the boy beating him this time. He would not let that happen. It wasn't like Jakob wanted him dead. He simply wanted the boy to leave his family alone, or to leave town, or something-anything so he would never have to see him standing on the street corner, ever again, shouting the headlines in his horrid voice. To Jakob, the sound of him standing on the corner, shouting the headlines, was the most awful sound in the world. He had resorted to holing himself up in his mansion just to avoid it! Yet the rest of his family seemed to like him...except Julia and Richard, who didn't know him very well. Which Jakob saw as a good thing. So he kept a close watch on Dawn from a safe distance just to find a good moment to strike. The moment came sooner then he expected. Just a few moments after he started watching them, he saw the two walk away. He followed them with his eyes and saw them leave out a door! This made Jakob suspicious-his mind flashed back to whe he found the two alone in the graveyard. Something was up. He waited until they walked out the door and walked over. He opened it just a tiny bit and saw them walking over behind a tree. He gasped and walked out and decided to surprise them. He walked over behind the tree, and without warning jumped out in front of them. "What are you doing out here, Dawn?! And with THAT no less?" he said as he pointed at Cheesemaster with his walking stick. "JAKOB!!!" screamed Dawn, pushing him. "You followed us!!!" "What are you doing out here?" he repeated. "Me and Cheesemaster went to look for Arkcher's dad!" "Really. That's a nice cover-up." "What...?" "Are you implying something?!" said Cheesemaster accusingly. "You know very well that I am! And you know what I am implying as well!" "Do you think me and Dawn came out here to make out or something?!" "Well, that's one way to put it." "You're insane!" "Says the sane boy who sells papers on the street corner." "WOULD YOU SHUT UP ABOUT THAT?!" Jakob looked down on him menacingly. "Don't you talk back to me, cheese-boy." "Is something wrong over here?" said a voice. Aloysius and Solrai peeked through the trees and were examining them. "ALOYSIUS!!! Arkcher's been looking for you!!" "Has he..." "MmmHmm." "Well...why?" While Dawn was explaining to Aloysius the situation, Jakob grabbed Cheesemaster by his collar. "Didn't I tell you to stay away from Dawn or else I'd kill you?" "You did! I tried telling Dawn that! She didn't think you were serious!" "Oh, I was dead serious." "Why do you want me dead?!" "I don't want you dead, so to speak. I want you to stay out of my family's life." "I'll never do that!!!" "And why not?" "One snobby rich man is not going to make me change my mind!" "Snobby Rich...?" Jakob let go of his collar and went for his throat. "Dawn, your friend..." said Aloysius, creeping out from behind the tree. Solrai tried to stop him. "You'll get hurt!" "JAKOB!!!" screamed Dawn. Aloysius grabbed Jakob and heaved him up, as Cheesemaster gasped for air. "You don't want to kill me, you say...you don't want to kill me, you say..." "Let go of me, you lousy inventor! Let go of me!" Cheesemaster got up, still gasping for breath. Dawn went over and made sure he was alright. "Jakob, how could you do this?" "Dawn, I said I didn't want him around you anymore! And you didn't take me seriously?!" "Of course not! Every other time you've tried to hurt him he made it out just fine! "I SAID LET GO OF ME!!!!" Jakob took his walking stick and flung it at Aloysius, but Solrai ran over and pushed Aloysius to the ground, dodging the blow. Solrai got up and started blindly trying to pick a fight with Jakob, a man who was much taller and much more muscular than she was. He looked down on her, menacingly, like he did with Cheesemaster. "Solrai, please, don't! You'll get hurt!" stammered Aloysius, getting up and trying to stop her. "Don't you ever strike at him like that!" "You ought to know your place, woman, before I have to do it for you." Aloysius looked at him, confused. "Are you saying that you'd-" Suddenly, Solrai screamed and fell to the ground, after having been struck by Jakob's walking-stick. Aloysius gasped and glared up at Jakob. Cheesemaster and Dawn simply stood aback, not wanting to get involved. "Did you just strike Solrai with your cane?!" "Indeed, I did." Aloysius was trying to keep his cool, and failing. "You DO NOT...EVER...Strike a woman!!! ESPECIALLY for a paltry reason as this!" "Don't make me send you down with her." "And I was having such a good time tonight, too...you know, we're going to miss seeing the King himself because of you!" "Go back on in, then! No need to fight with me!" "This woman, she's...she's my..." he gulped and said, nervously, "She is my girlfriend! And you just struck her for no reason!" "Huh! You should have used FORCE to get her to stop, then I would never hit her." "I'm not like you, Jakob! I don't use force! ESPECIALLY not on a woman!!" "Hmph," muttered Jakob. "You're weak." Aloysius picked up Solrai and tried to see if she was conscious. She was just waking up and slowly opened her eyes. Jakob was scowling at him, and then, with a loud huff, walked back inside, slamming the door shut. "Oh, Solrai...I'm so, so, so sorry our night turned out like this..." "It's alright, Aloysius. It was enough to spend time with you. Now come on. We'll miss the main event of the party if we stay out here." Aloysius turned around and saw that Dawn and Cheesemaster had already gone back inside. Aloysius helped her get back on her feet, and taking her hand, went back inside. ---------------------------- Luckily, they had come just in time as a giant cake Horatio had baked was being set out for everyone in the room, and Hamsterking himself was about to come and greet everyone, and they would be singing the Birthday Song soon. "Oh, this is exciting!" said Aloysius, who was slowly becoming over-excited. He was not only with the love of his life, but he was about to meet a real king! Well, technically, he had "met" him when he walked in, but he would be celebrating a King's Birthday! ---------------------------- "...HAPPY HAMSTER BIRTHDAY DEAR HAMSTERKING, HAPPY HAMSTER BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!" sang Horatio. Aloysius whispered to Solrai, "He has such a nice voice for a hamster." She nodded in agreement as she put her head on his shoulder. After everyone clapped, Hamsterking came out and cut the cake and gave a piece to everyone, including Aloysius and Solrai, who went to sit down by themselves. "What kind of cake is this?" asked Aloysius, as he was about to eat some. "If you must know...I haven't been one to come to parties the time I've been here." Aloysius cut open the cake and saw it was partially chocolate and vanilla. "Oh, good!" Suddenly, he heard a voice that belonged to Arkcher. "Dad!! It's about time I found you!" "Oh! Arkcher, MK, Kat, Cheesemaster, and PMM too!" The four teenagers and one midget adult came running towards him and Solrai with cakes in hand. Kat was trying to eat her cake with chopsticks. PMM got near Aloysius and said in the most sultry voice he could, "Did you and Solrai have fuuuuuuun outside!" Aloysius and Solrai both turned red and Aloysius stammered, "Uh, well, yes! I did enjoy my time alone." Solrai said nothing. It was clear to Aloysius she was shy around these other people. "Come on, you five, get some chairs and sit here." "Aloysius..." whispered Solrai, "I don't like being around lots of people." "It's alright. We'll have plenty of time later on!" Solrai gasped and whispered, "Whatever do you mean?"

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Aloysius sprayed his drink in sheer shock. "Excuse me?! Did you just say she is not a woman?!" "Woodstock is a man, Aloysius." "So-So-Glowurm-" "Yes." "But-" "Woodstock is a cross-dresser. He's getting better if he was able to fool someone as smart a you.""Well, I-I noticed-I noticed that HE had a very small chest, and that HE nearly crushed me when HE hugged me." "But Aloysius, it's best you don't tell Woodstock you know. He'd be so upset." "A-alright," he stuttered, still in shock. "This isn't the best thing to be talking about after finally seeing you after such a long time." "I agree. In fact...it looks like we're both done eating. Come here." She stood up and walked over to Aloysius, and he got up, too. The two of them embraced, and didn't let go of each other for many, many moments, simply feeling each other breathe. Suddenly, Aloysius remembered: "I brought something." He reached down into his case as Solrai asked excitedly, "Ooh, what is it?!" Aloysious pulled out his violin and rosined the bow. Solrai gasped as Aloysius started to play a soft, romantic tune. Solrai said nothing, simply listening to him serenade her, preferring to stay quiet until he was done. She shut her eyes, sighed happily, and absorbed the music he was playing. Finally, he was done and he sat back down. "What do you think?" "You are so talented....what song was that? Who is the composer?" Aloysious giggled softly, clutched her hands, and whispered, "I wrote it just for you." Solrai tried to make a sound, but her excitement was too much. She got up and plunged into his arms. "Aloysius...I...I...Oh, if I only had some talent I could use to make you something, too..." "No need, my dear. Being with you is enough for me." "But...Aloysius...why would you write a song especially for me?" He leaned in until his face was very close to hers. "I looked and looked for a song to play for you, but none seemed to be good enough. So I wrote a song, especially for you, because...because....because I love you." Solrai started to cry. "Aloysius...I-" Suddenly, Aloysius shushed her. He could hear music from the party playing. "Do you hear that, Solrai?" "Yes..." He back away from her a small bit. "May I have this dance?" Solrai laughed and nodded, and the two started to sway in time to the slow beat; and the two realized that they had never felt happier in their entire lives then they did now, together again. Solrai had never felt such joy in her entire life, and Aloysius hadn't felt so warm ever since the day he met Lara; even the happiness he felt when each of his children were born could not compare to how he felt with this woman he was deeply in love with. He felt like he could just burst with the emotion inside him. The song ended just as his train of thought ended, and he held Solrai in his arms. His heart grew warm and his stomach tied into a knot, as the two of them sat back down. Solrai dragged her chair over next to Aloysius's seat, and she put her head on his shoulder as they held each other's hands. -------------------------- Although he was still worried about Aloysius, Arkcher decided not to think about him and simply enjoy himself. He danced with MK, and assumed his father was outside having alone time with Solrai. Finally, the pair sat down, tired from moving around so much. Both of them reached for their drinks and ended up touching each other's hands. MK drew hers away, and cleared her throat. "Uh...what do you think your father is doing?" "Probably making out with Solrai or something...I wonder when Hamsterking will show up?" "I don't know. Where did Cheesemaster go?" "Probably trying to escape from Cheese Woman." --------------------------- Well, for the most of the par-tay, he had been running from Cheese Woman, but she eventually caught up with him and forced him to dance with her. And he found it wasn't so bad-as long as she realized they were just dancing as friends.

Cheesemaster groaned and said a muffled "Dang it," as he reached into his coat pocket and got out some of the change he had saved up from selling papers, and bought Aloysius another Coal Square. Aloysius, once again, downed the shot. His entire body shook with the sweet blend of Blackberry and Coconut, and he let out a happy sigh. All of a sudden, he pushed the two women away from him and stammered, "I want....I want to talk to Solrai." Cheesemaster spun around and said, "What?!" The two women gasped and said, "Oh My God, did he already have a girlfriend?!" "I-It's alright," he stuttered. "I-I'm sure-I'm sure Solrai....wouldn't mind if I explained it to her..." "She doesn't have to know, Aloysius." "No, No! I already feel horrible that I've been hanging around two women, one of which has a boyfriend already, and I haven't told my own girlfriend that I was...and that i haven't told my Girlfriend that I'm cheating on my wife...and I haven't told my wife either..." "WHAAAAAAAT???" screamed Who Are You and Woodstock. "You already had a wife, who you were cheating on with Solrai, who you are cheating on with Who Are You, who you are cheating on with me, and thus means I'm cheating on Glowurm, even though he already knows?!" "Maybe...something like that...." Kat simply sat at the bar, grinning stupidly, and said, "That Coal Square is some strong liquor." She put down the glasses she was washing, and said, "Cheesie, I'd recommend you don't let him do anything. He might do something he would regret saying, and he won't remember. That happens to me sometimes!" "Alright, Kat. ARKCHER!!! GET OVER HERE!!" ---------------------------- Arkcher and Mushroom were dancing over in the corner, when they heard Cheesemaster calling them. "Oh, no...what happened this time?" wondered MK as the two ran over. Arkcher examined Cheesemaster holding his father up. "What the....?! What happened?!" "Your father wanted a drink, so me, Woodstock, and Glow wanted to get him something mild, but he ordered a Coal Square instead. Then he made me buy him another." "And?" "Uh, your dad's drunk." Arkcher sighed and murmured something, and then spoke up. "Uh...can he not walk or something?" "No, I'm trying to get him to not call Solrai." "What??" "If you haven't noticed, he's been dancing with Who Are You and Woodstock all night, and now, he wants to tell Solrai that he's been using her to cheat on his wife, and now he's cheating on Solrai with Who are you, who he cheating on with Woodstock, who is using Aloysius to cheat on Glowurm. What a mouthful." "Geez..." "And he wants to tell your mom, too." "WHAT?! No. I mean, No. I mean, No." "Yep, my thoughts, too." "Cheese...LET GO OF ME!!!!" "No!" Aloysius was struggling to get out of Cheesemaster's grip, but was failing; the strong alcohol in his system made him weaker, and Cheesemaster knew how to get a good hold on someone. "Dad, you can't tell mom that you're here OR that you're cheating on her! She'll explode!!" "What do you...what do you mean, my boy?" "You know how she is...I mean..." Cheesemaster and MK were surprised when they saw Arkcher's hair fall in front of his eyes and he fell silent. "Arkcher...?" said MK, leaning down to touch his shoulder. He suddenly held his head up, and said, "Dad, you understand, don't you?" Aloysius only glared at him, confused. He tried to say something, but he fell to the ground, and seemed to have lost consciousness. Cheesemaster sighed and fell on his knees. "What did you do?" "I didn't do anything." Arkcher sighed. "I hope dad doesn't do this tomorrow at Hamsterking's party, because Solrai will be there." ------------------------------ The next day, Aloysius woke up only to find himself in bed back at Arkcher's Mansion. "Oh, dear...what...what happened?" "You got drunk at Planet Horatio last night," said Arkcher. "Really? I don't recall." "I thought so. Just...dad, don't drink anything heavy at Hamsterking's birthday party tonight. Solrai will be there-" "SOLRAI WILL BE THERE?!" shouted Aloysius, jumping out of bed. "I...I...I need...I need to look my best!!" Arkcher sat him back down on the bed. "Don't worry, dad. You have all day to get ready." "It doesn't matter! If I rest now, I simply won't be ready later and I'll waste time! Do I have to dress up?" Arkcher giggled. "No, you can go in what you're wearing now." "No, No! I have to look nice for her! You'd want to look nice for Mushroom_king, wouldn't you?" Arkcher blushed and said, "Well...I already AM kind of dressed nice-and, uh, MK likes me for who I am. Not for how I look." "Well, that's fine! But I haven't known Solrai for as long a time as you have known Mushroom!" And therein lies the problem, thought Arkcher. "I...I think..." "What?" "I want to bring my violin! I want to play it for her." "Oh? Uh...dad, if you don't know how you got here, how do you have it?" Aloysius sank down on the bed. "Oh...I don't have it..." "No worries! We have a room full of instruments!" "But it won't be the same..." "No, No! Don't talk that way! It'll be the same! I want you to be as happy as you can be!" Aloysius sighed and got up. "Alright, please show me the instrument room!" "It's actually called The Conservatory." "I know, I was wondering if you called it that or not." -------------------------- After quite a walk through the Mansion, the two stumbled upon the Conservatory." "You have quite a few rooms. You never did give me a proper tour of your house." "Uh, yea. We haven't had a whole lot of time." "Understandable. Oh, wow! Look at all these! There's guitars of every sort! A piano! Oh, how nice! I always wanted to learn to play a piano. Ooh, Drums! A harp! And here....a violin!!!" Aloysius grabbed a chair and sat next to the rack of string instruments. He grabbed himself an instrument, a bow, and some rosin. He rosined the bow and began to play a few notes, and after a few minutes Arkcher realized he was tuning. Before he knew it, Aloysius was done making sure the instrument was in tune, Arkcher had a wave of nostalgia come rushing back to him and his father started playing an unnamed tune on the violin. Arkcher sighed heavily and happily as his father kept playing. Arkcher suddenly yawned and Aloysious stopped and laughed. "I played that for you when you were a baby so you would sleep." "It still works." The two of them laughed together, but Aloysious because serious and said, "But am I good enough to impress her?" "I think so. Besides, if she really likes you, she'll appreciate it." "Alright. By the way...who does this belong to?" "If you must know...It's mine. I tried learning to play. I wanted to learn that song for Sean and Julian. But I couldn't find it." "That's because I wrote it especially for you." "Y-You Did?!" "Indeed, I did. I tried every song I could find, and none worked on you, even though they worked on your siblings. So I wrote a song, specially, just for you." "Oh...wow....I-I feel...really happy to know that." Aloysius giggled and the two hugged. "Dad." "Yes, Arkcher?" "I'm...I'm glad you're here." "I'm glad I'm here." -------------------------- A few hours after that moment, Aloysius was frantic to get ready for Hamsterking's par-tay. He started off my taking one of the longest showers in history (according to Paper Mario master), washing his hair, shaving, washing his face, getting dressed (but he added a classy bow tie to his ensemble), brushing his teeth so hard it's a wonder you couldn't use them as a mirror, tuning his violin, Practicing what he would say to Solrai, asking questions (should I bring a present? Will we sing the classic birthday song or a different one? Will I be able to be alone with Solrai? That last one made Arkcher feel kind of awkward.), wondering what he would eat and drink, selecting what songs he would play for Solrai, and then putting on a coat because it might be cold. He felt ready, but he was still nervous; he hadn't seen Solrai in several months. "Dad, are you ready?" asked Arkcher. "Dad, I said you didn't have to dress up." "I didn't. I thought I might be cold." "Fine, Fine." ------------------------------ The group, having originally intended to fly out to the castle like they usually did, saved themselves a lot of time when they learned that Hamsterking was in Hamsterdam. They ate at Planet Horatio, but the place had been dressed up in banners and balloons that enthusiastic Horatio had set up. And he was more excited then ever when the guests all arrived. Legions of Invisionists said "Happy Birthday, Hamsterking!!" as they walked in and hung their coats up. Except Aloysius. He was the last to walk in, and simply fell to his knees in front of Hamsterking. "Oh, what an honor to meet you FINALLY!!!" "And you are Aloysius Ahrroww, correct?" "That is me, your highness!" "You don't have to act like I'm all high and mighty, you know." "Dad, we talked about this..." "I'm sorry, Son...It's just...OH MY GOODNESS! SOLRAI!!!" and with that he ran off to look for her. "That was my father." "I thought so." "He's, uh, not so excitable usually." "Why is he looking for Solrai?" "Um...they're dating." Hamsterking was shocked. "What?!" "Yeah...I thought it was odd, too." "But Arkcher, your mother!" "My mother hates me and my father." ---------------------------- Aloysius weaved through the crowd, looking for Solrai in the crowd, looking frantically. He hoped and prayed that she had come. As he was looking around, her ended up bumping into someone. And, like most situations like this, Aloysius was shocked to see that he had run into Solrai. He apologized profusely, but stopped when Solrai put an arm around him and shushed him with the other. "Come on. I have something to show you." ----------------------------- Solrai took Aloysius's hand and led him out of Planet Horatio and led him out to a small private area. There, he saw a small table with a candle and two chairs. She sat him down in one chair and sat herself down in the other. She looked at him with wide, glittering eyes. "I missed you so much." "Me too. I was thinking just the other night how much I wanted to see you." "Really?!" "Yes...I...I thought about you every day. I desperately wanted to even just talk to you again. But you don't have a phone...do you?" "No...but I'd get one only to talk to you." "Would you really?!" Solrai nodded. "Do you want something to eat or drink?" Aloysius leaned in from across the table. "Would I want to crush those butterflies in my stomach?" Solrai gasped and blushed a bright shade of pink. Aloysius sat back in his seat. "I'm dreadfully sorry. I...shouldn't say things like tha-" "No, no!" whispered Solrai. "It's perfectly fine!! I feel the same way. But you should eat something. I've begun to notice how skinny you are." "I'm fine." "Don't say that. You should eat something. I can't stand to look at you when you look like you're wasting away." "I'm telling you, Solrai, I'm perfectly healthy. But I'll eat something to make you happy. But, uh, who's gonna take our orders out here?" "Don't you worry. I'll go in and-" "No, No. You stay here, and I'll buy it." "No, Aloysious. Save your money. I'll buy it, like a good-" "A good gentleman always buys for his lady." Solrai sighed. "Alright. I'll wait here." Aloysius was about to walk away, when he turned around and said, "Do you want to come with me?" Solrai got up. "I-I guess so." "I'll still be paying, though." ---------------------------- "What the...?! Where did Dad go?! We've search every nook and cranny of this place and haven't found him or Solrai. I wanted to introduce him to everyon-" "There he is. He's at the bar." "WHAT??? We checked there like five times!!" "He's with Solrai, too." The group walked up to the bar and interrupted Aloysius and Solrai. "Dad, where have you been?! We've looked all over for you!!!" "I..uhm...I've been in here. Have you looked hard enough? "Dad, tell me the truth." "I've been outside with Solrai." "Bow Chikka Wow Wow!" whispered PMM. "Fine. I wanted to introduce you to the other Invisionists." "Son...I need to spend some time with Solrai first. Besides, you should spend time with MK." "W-what?!" "Where is she, anyhow?" "She's with Vanilla Star Hamster and Dawn." "Dad, I spend time with MK every day. Not so much Cheesemaster." Aloysius heaved. "Alright. Well, me and Solrai are going to leave now, alright?" "Fine." "I promise to meet everyone later!" "Please keep your promise!" "I Will." And with that, the two left. Cheesemaster glanced over at the now-angry Arkcher. "Uh...Arkcher, your dad has NEVER acted like that as long as I've known him." ---------------------------- Back outside, Solrai had gotten a salad (Called "White Unicorn") and Aloysious had gotten a strange Glowing Spaghetti. And for drinks, they both got Yellow Submarines. (Aloysius decided not to risk doing anything stupid again, so he got a milder drink.) "Uhm...Why does this glow, anyhow?" "It's a special kind. I think. I don't come here very often..." "Are you still a loner, Solrai?" "Well...I...Yes. I tried to go talk to other people...but I didn't have much to talk about. And the only person I wanted to see...was you." Aloysious stopped eating for a moment and looked into Solrai's eyes. They were the same lovely blue he saw just months ago, the same blue as his own. And there he decided to tell her what had happened. "Solrai..." "Yes?" "Last night, I was here, and I..." "Did you dance with another woman?" "Yes," he said, ashamed. "It's completely alright. But who was it?" "I think....Woodstock, I believe." Solrai said nothing for a moment, and then said, "You told me it was a woman." "Excuse me?" "You told me you danced with another woman." "I di-" "Woodstock is not a woman."

-How to be entertained on the internet- 1. Google "Nostalgia Critic" and/or "Fail Blog"

Roger took his cigarette and put it in the ashtray. "As she said, I play the piano. I play most nights, usually weekends." And with that, he walked up and sat at a piano that Aloysius just noticed had been up there the whole time. Roger sat in the chair, played a few keys, and started to play out a soft melody. "Let's dance," said the Magician. "By the way, You can simply call me "Who Are You"." "Alright, Who Are You. I still think that's such an odd title. But then again...most people here seem that way." Who Are You nodded. Aloysius looked into one of her eyes and saw it was coated in thick, glittery eye makeup. She smiled. "Excuse me," said a low voice. The pair turned around to see a young woman wearing a tye-dye dress and a tye-dye headband in her messy, blond hair. Coming out of her back were two small wings. Aloysius didn't want to admit it, but he couldn't help but notice the woman's small chest and manly figure. "Woodstock!" exclaimed Who Are You. "How are you, my good-" she swallowed nervously, "My Good Woman?" Woodstock slinked over and put her hands on Aloysius's shoulders. "Oh, wow. I haven't seen such a handsome face in years." "That's just what I thought!" said Who Are You excitedly. "I'm surprised that he hasn't got every woman in here clamoring over him." Aloysius blushed and scratched his head. The women of Invision apparently thought he was cute. "C-Could I dance with him, Who Are You?!" She let go of his shoulders reluctantly. "Oh, I guess so. Besides, I need to go backstage and practice my stage magic. I'm not so good at it. I'm better at real magic!" "Or so I hear," said Woodstock. She squeezed Aloysius tightly, nearly breaking his spine, and then put her hands around his neck, and the two moved together to the beat of Roger's Piano. "You know...That young man, he's very good at playing." "Who? Oh, Roger. Yes, he's very good." "I play an instrument, too." "Oh, really?! Me, too! I play Acoustic Guitar. And you?" "Violin." "Oh..." "Is something wrong?" Woodstock looked up at Aloysius; her eyes were sparkling, and she took one hand and smoothed her messy hair. "Are you very good at it? I mean, your instrument." "Oh, I guess so. But I can handle criticism." Aloysius was about to ask about her wings when they heard Glowurm's voice from next to them. "Woodstock?" "Oh, Glowwy!" Woodstock let go of Aloysius and the worm and the girl embraced each other. "Aloysius, this is my boyfriend. I'm dating Glowurm!" As Aloysius had no plans to date Woodstock, he grinned. "I'm so happy for you." "I'm half-bird, so it's only half-bestiality." Aloysius giggled. "Anyway, could I get the two of you something to drink? Come on, let's go to the bar." ---------------------------- "There's your Prozac Milkshake, ma'am," mumbled Kat. She handed the frothy pink drink to an emo girl sitting at the bar. We'll get to her some other time. "Thanks," said the girl, and she drank it just as Aloysius, Woodstock, and Glowurm walked up there. "Well, what do you want, Aloysius? It's Friday, so go ahead and have some Alcohol if you want." Aloysius was already looking at the choice of Drinks. "Electric Fetus...?" "...I think, just something gentle. Uh, maybe, Yellow Submarine..." "I think I'll have this," he said, pointing to a Black Drink. "The Coal Square Award." "Um, are you positively sure?" "I love Blackberry." "A-Alright." said Kat, and she mixed up the drink for him. "Here you go," she said, handing the shot to him. He downed it in a second. "Oh My goodness! It's so sweet! This is sooooo goooooooooood! Gimme another!" "Aloysius, that's not such a good thing to do. Do you want a bad hangover?" "Uh-" "Exactly." "Oh, fine." "That drink is a really strong one, though. Be careful, drive safely...oh, I forgot to Card you. Eh, you look old enough." "Kat Dacatis, That's irresponsible." Muttered Cheesemaster, who was apparently up there too. Not drinking, though, as he's more responsible then that. "Eh, don't get so worked up, Cheesy." Aloysius sat there, with two women clamoring over him, with Glowurm giving jealous looks to him. "Hey, Cheesemaster!" said Aloysius. "Eh?" "Lemme ask you five questions. If you get one wrong, you gotta buy me a drink." "Sounds good enough to me." "Alrighty then, first question. What is your name?" "Cheesemaster." "Correct. What kind of vehicle do you drive?" "A bike." "Right. Who is the king of Invision?" "Hamsterking." "Alright. Are you ready for the next question?" "I think so." "What number question is this?" "Uh....four?" "Wrong. It's five. Buy me another Coal Square."

downloading stuff off LimeWire.

Sometimes Americans are so uninformed and that is really scary. And thus is why my faith in Humanity is over -9 million.

Which CD is your favorite? I don't have one. Meaning you don't have any Satriani CD's or you can't pick a favourite? both.

You know, if you gave that a philosophical name, you could make a million dollars off it.

Meanwhile, back at Planet Horatio, Graf Von and Cutie Puppet's act was just ending and the two were bowing as the crowed clapped. The 3rd act of the night was about to start. "I think you'll like this one," said Roger, to Aloysius. "Isn't this the final act?" Roger took a drag on his cigarette. "Oh, Poppycock..." "Eh?" wondered Aloysius, but Roger said nothing. Suddenly, a woman's voice came over the intercom: "Gather 'Round and Look Closely!" The lights dimmed, and a spotlight moved around the room. It stopped on the stage and suddenly disappeared. "There's nothing in my hand! There's nothing in my sleeve!" And with that, the spotlight reappeared and the most bizarre woman Aloysius had ever seen in his entire life appeared. She was tall and slightly chubby, wearing a t-shirt made of two different fabrics. Her left arm had a long sleeve, and her right arm had no sleeve, with several tattoos and jewelry. Over the t-shirt was half of a vest, with a safety pin barely attaching it to her body, and a tank top with no strap. Barely holding up a frayed pink tutu was a single, checkered suspender. Around her neck was a golden bow-tie and an untied necktie covered with top hats and rabbits. She had too many earrings to count, and had several necklaces as well as the dressier neck pieces. She wore pants; her right leg was floor-length with the bottoms tucked into snow boots, while her other leg had purple shorts with harlequin tights, a checkered Garter, and a single ballet slipper with a little yellow pompom. On her head was a top hat, worn with age, and on her face, was a mask that only covered half of her face. Her hair was buried in hair clips, bows, barrettes, and hairpins. She took a wand out of a pocket in her tutu and bowed. "I will need an assistant!" she shouted to the crowed. The spotlight came off her and centered on Aloysius. He blushed nervously. "W-Who, Me?!" "You! My good sir! I have never seen your face before! Come here!" Aloysius shakily got up and walked onstage. "Sir, what is your name?" "Aloysius Apollo Ahrroww." "You're Arkcher's father, eh? You look just like him. You can call me Who Are You? Who Am I?." "Where'd you get a name like that?" "I didn't say it was my name. I said you could call me that." "O-Oh! My apologies." "No worries. You'll be my assistant for tonight's show!" Aloysius seemed calm. This SHOULD be perfectly fi- "First off, let's do a classic: The Man in The Box!" "What?" But before he could do anything, He found himself inside the wooden box, with the woman holding a saw above his body. She whispered to him: "Don't worry. This is only stage magic, not real magic." "Alright, Alright!" whispered Aloysius. He sighed and calmed down. She brought the saw down onto the box Aloysius was in and sawed the box. She looked over at Arkcher and winked when she was done sawing the box. "I'm afraid your father isn't half the man he used to be, Arkcher..." Arkcher pretended to be shocked, and the spotlight went back to the magician girl. She spread the two boxes apart, and opened them...and out came Aloysius, full and uncut. The crowed applauded and the two bowed. "Thank you for your help, Aloysius." and with that, she sent him back to his seat. When he got back, he started talking to Roger. "When I was up there, she said something like, 'This is stage magic, not Real Magic.' What did she mean?" Roger took a long drag, looked at he ceiling, and explained. "Who Are You? Who Am I? is an Illusion Magician. That means she not only does stage magic, but she can do real magic, too. And trust me. She's deadly!" "Oh my. And...um...this is a bit rude, but the way she dresses...?" "Oh, I have no idea...she's never bought clothing in her life. All her clothing, she got from the trash bin, and she typically has to sew 'em together. And that hat, it's apparently been in her family forever." "Interesting..." Meanwhile, the magician was up on the stage, and when Aloysius looked up, all he saw was a load of cards exploding outward from her. He jumped back and Roger giggled. It was the first time Aloysius saw him smile. The crowed clapped, and The bizarre woman took off her top hat, tapped the rim with her wand, and out came a rabbit. "This is my dearest friend, Clarytis!" And she tapped the hat more and out came a storm of doves. They all flew out to the crowed and vanished in a puff of smoke; except one, which stayed on her shoulder. "And this is my sanity...Ardnek! Those were his brothers! Well, everyone, I deeply apologize, but I must be on my way..." and, like any good magician, she, her rabbit, and her dove vanished. Aloysius stood up and clapped, only to feel a tap on his shoulder. He turned around and saw Who Are You? Who Am I? just behind him. She took his shoulder with one hand grabbed one of his suspenders with the other. "It's simply not every day that my spotlight picks me out such a handsome piece of man such as yourself." Aloysius slowly stepped away from her and blushed. "I-I-I....uh..." "Oh, shhhh," she whispered, and took the hand on his shoulder and grabbed his other suspender, and slowly leaned in and kissed his cheek. She pulled her face away and he looked at her face for the first time, real good. The majority of her face was obscured by a mask, making it difficult for him to really get a good look at her. "Come on, Aloysius. I'm sure Roger That will be playing his piano soon. Do you want to dance with me?" Aloysius instantly thought of Solrai, which made him think of Lara. But he didn't care. If he got on this woman's good side, maybe he would see her face and learn her name.

She said she might not want to go back there.

But really, whenever we told someone we were American they would say "Oh, Oh! I love your new president!"

Which CD is your favorite? I don't have one.

MEANWHILE, IN BERLIN....

Joe Satriani is really awesome. Also, Mute Math.

[it's alright. Though I feel kind of heartless because I just don't want my brother in our life anymore.]

AAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Would you like the deep-friend Hamster? =D

Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. Muse. Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. Blur. Chad Vangaalen. Chad Vangaalen. And I almost forgot Chad Vangaalen.

Oh Ho Ho! Well, Lifeseagle...you will fall, because Planet Horatio is introducing a new feature: Cannibalism night!!! That's right kids! We have every species, plus Cheese for Cheesemaster!! Mmmmmm! I think I will have the Brownie Brownie with the mushrooms!!

[WHEN IN ROME] [...what? The only When in Rome I know of is the band...] [ I thought your mother would have taken you to Rome by now. ] no

Dog Lover, when I was in Paris, I went to the Hard Rock Cafe, and they had some of Elton John's glasses...I took a pic but I can't find it. I'm sorry.

Meet The Robinsons... sounds great. I really didn't expect it to be any good, but it was really, really good. I expected it to have bad, kiddy humor, but it was genuinely funny. Lots of "What The Fork?" moments, too.

[WHEN IN ROME] [...what? The only When in Rome I know of is the band...]