Mega Wolf

Yeah, the prom date, according to another friend that's known him longer and actually dated the prom date's exes, apparently falls in and out of love in a matter of like two seconds so, I'm good with knowing that and not dealing with it. I'm a little annoyed because my ex will randomly remember I exist, but generally no, and of course when he started dating the other girl(we were still talking fairly often then), he didn't really mention it to me and I had to find out through social networking? Doesn't really matter now, though, since, again, he's contacted me maybe a couple of times since then. This other friend, well, it's a little more complicated. She's known him longer than I have by about four years and she's had a massive crush on him forever, she's kind of weird about it(as in he likes something and all of a sudden, she's obsessed with that). Remember that the 26-year-old and I have an on and off romantic interest. So, she's literally one year older than me and when I was 17 she would pull the "you're not old enough" card. Now she doesn't have that card to grumble at me about. So, since she's no longer just nagging me about how I'm too young, she doesn't even bother talking to me despite the "we're best friends" bit we had for a while. When she thinks I'm not on good terms with the 26-year-old, she's on it immediately. The whole he's crazy about me and not her thing seems to be what really bugs her, though she's really closed about it and will never say it.

So, in this past month, a lot has happened. I was staying in contact with the prom date, even would visit him after rehearsal occasionally. Then he went to a show, where he met another member's now-ex-girlfriend. Didn't really know this when he was hugging/kissing/treating me like I was his girlfriend after the show. Couple days later I tried making plans with him on the 4th, he said he couldn't because he had plans with his mom. Then she cancelled, he didn't try to make plans with me after so I just went and had my own fun elsewhere. Well, he made plans with her. Now she's apparently the most amazing girl in the world. I'm slightly hurt by that, but I'll get over it. My ex has barely contacted me, and I decided to not make the effort either. I've given up on him as a best friend, as I've given up on Ashley, who only talks to me when she doesn't think I'm on good terms with the 26-year-old. At least the 26-year-old is a good friend, along with another friend keeping me sane.

Enjoy the fireworks.

Summer is going very well.

Now for another very busy summer. lol.

Aaaand I'm graduated!

In other words, what I'm saying is, we are two very confused people about what we want, but at least I can admit it. If he's just hurting me by doing stupid stuff like not inviting me to hang out after even though he invites everyone else, then he's not even under the classification of "friend".

I've come to a couple of conclusions. 1. She was probably just mad because he was looking. 2. He's not even worth my time as a friend as of right now. Honestly, I shouldn't waste any more energy on trying to keep my friendship with him. After we graduated, big hug first thing from him. Then he barely glances my way once she's around. Last night at our mutual friend's graduation party, they were both there. He didn't talk to me and was looking at me as soon as she walked away. She was just trying to rub in my face that they were together, but she was failing at it seeing as she would hint for him to hold her hand(I know the techniques, and I've used them successfully), but he was pretty much way less interested in her than she in him.

Graduation is on Thursday!

Oh, wonderful. Ex/best friend's date, who I got the free party bus tickets that would have cost $100 and I made her corsage? She "didn't get along with" me at prom apparently because she was uncomfortable about how I was dancing with my date. GREAT. I went through trouble to help things along for her and what do I get? Yeah, I knew she already disliked me for being his ex, but she has NO room to judge me for how I was dancing. Oh, and yesterday I told him I was uncomfortable with her being at graduation(um, they're not dating, I already kinda assumed she didn't like me, but the confirmation of it just made me angry). Obviously, based on status updates, he told her and she took it way out of context as me wanting a cat fight and she made it seem like she was just going to avoid it and be the "better person". Frick, I was just irritated because I was uncomfortable with it, I wasn't saying I hated her or wanted to fight.

I'm gonna start off in community college. Then I have to figure out from there where to go since I've decided to be a psychiatrist rather than a band director. Hooray for many years of school to come.

I could have a very, very bizarre TV series written about my romantic life.

School is almost out. Check out end of this week. Graduation next week.

(yes, he's 18)

Sooo, real quick, pic. Alright, so, here's new problem. Questioning simple adoration of the older guy(perhaps it's because I just don't see him often, since clearly I feel different about him when I see him), prom date was awesome, gonna hang out with older guy at amusement park Friday after I graduate, gonna hang out with prom date that weekend in my town. SO. As usual, I'm in a bit of a pickle. Older guy I thoooouuught we were going with the just best friends route but he's still acting jealous in a non-harmful way. Prom date and I may have serious interest. To clarify, I have no actual relationship status with either guy. This could all just disappear any moment. lol. Just another part of my life that'll just have to sort itself out eventually? hah.

So, here's the thing. I've gone through so many phases about guys this year it's getting kinda weird. hahaha. I did the whole, I love him, I miss him, about my ex for about a week, realizing I'm mostly just adoring of my instructor, but then after all that I'm crushed about my ex stuff for about a week, I actually seriously got over it really quickly when I actually saw him interested in someone else, i.e., I didn't care. Then I had an amazing time with my prom date and I'm already falling hard, which is really kinda funny if you look at the time frame this is all happening in.

Prom is tomorrow!

Hehe! Awesome. I love all your pictures, by the way.

Happy birthday, tibfoff.

Life carries on. After AP tests, now I'm not doing anything at school. All that's happening is the rotting of my brain. Plus, it's almost like I'm studying film, what, with watching 3 movies in a day.

I got home from hanging out with a couple of my closest friends. :3

Prom is a week away! I've promised myself to not get into a real relationship until summer is over so I can sort out what I really want. Hooray! I'm finally thinking about the actions I've taken in a year, and I've been realizing what I've done horribly wrong. It's okay though, it's for the best, it'll only make me stronger. I know now what it's like for a guy to hurt me mentally in the "he's really over me" aspect[ex-boyfriend that I dumped multiple times, I might add], so that's a new experience that I need to deal with that I'm not used to. But, there's plenty of time to learn.

So cute.

I love your pictures, Horatio.

Haha, yeah, especially since age limit is 20